I'm such a loser.
Suck my dick.

Nothing special, I know. Others have topped this by miles. But I feel more excited about this than Christmas, so just give me that attention already.

ive been pm'ed by 9 different people telling me to spam and insult the clockcrew STOP FUCKING PMING ME I GET IT YOU CUNTS so i found out that the clockcrew fantasize about don vito so i made them one special just for the clockcrew SO CLOCK CREW GO STICK ANAL BEADS UP AN OCTOPUSES ANAL AS IT IS AWNSERING A PUBLIC TELEPHONE WHILE A JELLY FISH STICKS A TOOTHBRUSH UP YOUR NOSE AND PLOWS A CALCULATOR UP YOUR ARSE HOLE YOU PATHETIC CUNT SCUM RATS FUCK YOU CLOCKCREW YOU FAGGOTZ
CUNTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!

nuff said

Seriously, I can't be bothered to think of an idea for my next flash. Think up an idea and you'll get co-author.

RULES LOL
Must not contain anything decent. I can't animate.
It can contain buttons and shit though. I can do that stuff.
Once again, not too advanced.
Must be passable, but still quite shit.
No voice acting.
Not too long.
Not boring.

Blah blah blah. No deadline, I'll just pick the best idea when I feel like it.

--------------------------------------
COMPETETION IS NOW OFF.
Vote five.

Doctor: I'm sorry mam. There's been an accident with the birth.

Woman: What's wrong?

Doctor: Your baby has been born with a rare mutation. Despite having two white parents, he's black.

Woman: Oh lawds, what shall we do? My husband and I can't afford that much chicken, let alone rap CDs.

Doctor: Don't worry, there's some good news.

Woman: What could possibly be good?

Doctor: It already got knifed.

This is Tom Fulp speaking.

My normal account is unaccessable for some reason, and me and the other admins can't figure out why. That's why I have to post this through my alt. Anyway, anybody know a possible reason? I'm sure there are a load of nerds out there who know what's up. Please help.

So I recently saw that BlueFlameSkulls wrote a book. Not to mention my own book which is 85 pages in and still not half way through. (Looks rubbish as a news post because copying directly from word fucked up the layout.)

Anyway, I had an idea based on these. BBS stories are popular, or were before they were banned. I was thinking, why don't I gather up a load of them - as well as any other stories by NGers - and publish them through Lulu? (This is not how I will publish my book, it's proper publishing or nothing for mine.)

So yeah. I'll make the price cheap, and download free. If you would like to contribute, please link to your stories. The more the better.

HOWEVER,
By agreeing this, you have to give me permission to edit your stories. No, not edit the writing. Definitely not that. I'm talking about spelling and punctuation. If it isn't set out nicely, I'll have to edit it to make it so. You have to let me do this.

Also, you will not receive profit. This price will only be, like, £3. I'll only get 40%, so in the unlikely event that a copy is sold rather than downloaded it would be far too hard to split that. Sorry.

Anyway, I hope you have something to give. If not, you can still suggest titles and stuff. You'll all be fully credited for your stories and contributions.

Discuss, while I think up a half decent news post.

Stop eating the goddamn comments button, people need to compliment me on my amazing literary skills and super coolness.

I know this is kind of a band wagon, but I just had to hop right on. These users are so fucking amazing that I just wish they would come round to my house for that big gay orgy I've been longing for. If you're reading this guys, please know that you are now the official NG legends. Also, suck me off and shit.

Cellardoor6
This guy is just the height of maturity. I've always wondered how one man can stop so many flame wars and prevent racial slur on the forums, but it's beyond my tiny brain. I only wish he was he was a mod so there would be less of that annoying opinionated prejudice that he fights so hard to destroy. Thank you.

Imperial-Hellkite
This guy is teh pwn. He's got this totally original Madness flash in the works which I'm totally wet-dreaming over right now. He also loves my Brackenwood Tribute which you ought to check out and vote five on.

Mariobro42
Oh my. God in human form.
I love how he can make so many one line posts yet still manage to maintain a high level of dignity and then be able to crack a few jokes. He a Sunshine lover too, which is always good. You can even enjoy him when he's banned, through his happy alts! I just can't get enough of that Yoshi picture. Keep up the great work.

GOTHCLAWZ
I just can't get enough of his girlfriends saggy boobs. I just wish I could pull off his totally non-emo hair cut without looking like a faggot. Not that he does, of course.
He's cool.

Homor
So fucking hardcore, and quite the artist. I can only begin to imagine what he'll be like when his testicles drop. Keeping it gangsta.

Sidorio
He's kind of a big deal around these parts.

Mechabloby
As per request, due to his unique style of posting and various original thoughts on getting off to furry porn. We just can't get enough of sucking your cock. Keep it up.

Please notify me if I've missed out any legends.

He deleted my awesome sig too, the bastard.
IT WAS JUST A JOKE.